Sulvinder Samra, ex-wife of TV doctor Dr Ranj Singh has reflected on the emotional aftermath of their divorce after he came out as gay.
Talking to Times Radio on Tuesday, Sulvinder, 45, admitted she was ‘hurt’ by the breakdown of her marriage and ‘worried about the judgement of others.
TV medic and former This Morning star, Dr Ranj 46, made the realisation about his sexuality when he was living with his wife of seven years after having therapy.
He is now in a happy relationship with actor, model, and personal trainer James Colebrook, with whom he went public on social media last year.
Sulvinder said that her parents were very supportive when her marriage broke down.
She said: ‘My dad just said, “Well, if he doesn’t want you, I want you back”, and that was just the nicest thing… Don’t, you’ll make me cry.
Dr Ranj Singh’s ex-wife Sulvinder Samra reflectED on the emotional aftermath of their divorce after he came out as gay on Tuesday as she admitted ‘it was hurtful and she worried about judgement from others’
TV medic and former This Morning star, Dr Ranj 46, made the realisation about his sexuality when he was living with his wife of seven years after having therapy
‘[My parents] knew that we were separated, We were separated at that point. We were separated for a little while before I got to know.
‘And in that separation period you kind of go, well could it be this, or could it be that. It was one of two things.
And you know, I knew that. So it wasn’t like a complete surprise for them. It was really tough. I don’t want to speak on behalf of them too much, but yeah, it takes a lot of time.
‘And then subsequently, when things were said in the media about it, that was – came out of nowhere.
‘I didn’t know. People would tell me about it and that was hurtful at that time. I didn’t feel safe enough to say anything.
‘You know, I cared about what people might think… Judgement. And you know, you have certain fears about it
‘I had to do my work in letting it go, And I’ve let go of it. I’ve definitely, but it’s a process, I don’t want to pick it back up, you know what I mean?’
The TV doctor is now involved in a relationship with actor James Colebrook after finding his ‘chosen family’ within the LGBTQ community (pictured in January)
Dr Ranj broke his silence after he recalled ending his seven-year marriage when he came out as gay – which has led to several blistering attacks from his ex wife.
A couple of weeks ago, Dr Ranj reflected on splitting from Sulvinder, saying his life ‘fell apart’ when their marriage ended in 2011 but that he took solace in finding his ‘chosen family’ within the LGBT community.
In response, Sulvinder shared her side of the story revealing it took years for her to heal from the split and that she battled feeling ‘unattractive, ashamed, and not good enough’.
After being supported by her social media followers, Sulvinder has now questioned her ex-husband’s intentions behind sharing the story, which he has recounted at various points over the years.
Amid the escalating tensions in the wake of his interview, on Sunday night Dr Ranj released a lengthy statement on Instagram where he said he never ‘deliberately’ hid anything about himself nor ‘intentionally try to mislead anyone’.
He added that he would never want to ‘diminish’ what him and Sulvinder had and said he looked back on that time and person ‘with nothing but respect, gratitude and kindness.’
He penned: ‘It’s been nearly 20 years since my divorce, but recent conversations have brought me back to a time that was complicated, emotional and deeply personal. Firstly, I’m genuinely sad that this subject can still bring up pain and difficult feelings.
‘That has never been, and would never be, my intention. I’ve only ever spoken about it because it’s a significant period of my life, when asked directly, and in the hope that it might help someone else.
‘I don’t do it for attention or sympathy – it was a very painful time. Out of respect, I’ve always been mindful of identifying or commenting on others involved, as that’s not my story to tell.’
He added: ‘In a recent interview, I was asked about my ‘coming out’ (a term I dislike because it implies hiding). It’s a conversation I’ve had time and time again, and I’ve taken to keeping it brief because everything has already been said.
‘Unfortunately, as in many cases of relationships involving a LGBTQ+ person (especially a person of colour), people still make assumptions and pass judgement. In reality, life and relationships are rarely straightforward.
‘I fell in love and was married for almost four years in my twenties (for context, I turn 47 next month).
‘Sadly that relationship broke down for many reasons, not to mention we were young and still working ourselves out. After it ended, therapy helped me to slowly understand what happened and who I was – a process that took years.
‘I didn’t grow up deliberately hiding who I was, nor did I intentionally try to mislead anyone. Like many people, I was trying to build the life I thought happiness looked like. If I’d truly known what I know now or it had been in another time, maybe it could’ve been different.
‘Identity and sexuality are complex, fluid and evolving things. Some figure it out early; others need longer – something I wish my younger self had understood.
‘We all make decisions and take steps we feel it’s for the best at the time. Sometimes we get it right, sometimes we don’t. When we don’t it can be painful and messy, but more than that, it’s just sad and heartbreaking for everyone involved. There are no winners in break-ups.’
‘However, I also wouldn’t want to diminish what we had together: what we shared, what we meant to one another, and what we learned from each other. It would reduce an important chapter of our lives to something negative, and that simply wouldn’t be fair or true. I look back on that time, and that person, with nothing but respect, gratitude and kindness.’
He concluded his post by saying: ‘Not everything in life goes the way we might have hoped or imagined. We stumble, learn, grow and hopefully try to do better. Over the last 20 years or so, l’ve done a lot of that… I’m different to the person I was then, and the world has changed too.
‘It’s important to keep moving forward, which is often easier said than done. As long as every step we take is with kindness – towards others and ourselves – that’s all that matters x.’
After being supported by her social media followers, Sulvinder has now questioned her ex-husband’s intentions behind sharing the story, which he has recounted at various points over the years.
She was in agreement when one follower commented on her initial post about the split: ‘What does Dr Ranj hope to achieve from continuing to tell this story? Fame? Money? Attention?’
‘It must be incredibly frustrating and embarrassing for this lady, as not only has he ruined her life – He seems to be profiting from her misfortune. He’s getting a pat on the back for being brave… whilst she still seems to be piecing her life back together.’
The follower went on: ‘If I’d unintentionally caused a person this much pain, I would perhaps tell my story once and leave it as that, for the sake of the person I hurt.’
In response, Sulvinder commented: ‘yes, it would appear to be that way unfortunately’.
Another follower penned: ‘Just because he’s an insecure little man he has to drag someone else through his selfishness and make you insecure too!
‘You were always too good for that ! Always know your power ❤️’
Sulvinder replied: ‘thank you. You have a great way with words!’
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