Celine Dion’s purse contains exactly what it should contain: a microphone, dog food and a landline telephone.
On Monday, the legendary vocalist, 57, brought her Instagram followers on a little tour of what she keeps in her bag, and the resulting video is a comedic masterpiece.
“I live in Vegas,” she explained as she reached into her oversized purse, grabbed a folding fan and fanned herself. “It’s hot!”
She then whipped out a plastic baggie containing kibble and “medicine” for her “beautiful” two-pound pooch.
Up next: Mentos mints! Dion panted to signify that she “sometimes” needs to freshen her breath.
The Grammy winner also carries “great” spray sanitizer for her hands as well as “great” hand cream.
“It’s one of my favorites: Byredo Blanche,” she said as she sniffed the tube of lotion dramatically.
Dion then pulled out her very “own microphone just in case … people ask [her] to sing ‘Happy Birthday.’”
“I’m ready!” she insisted before breaking out into a rendition of Nat King Cole’s “Unforgettable.”
“It takes a lot of balls,” she cheekily added as she picked up two billiard balls on the pool table in front of her, “to get the microphone and pretend that you are on.”
While belting out a portion of Cher’s “Believe,” Dion whipped out a rock with the word “Believe” engraved on it.
She then held up a VIP badge from her “Courage” world tour, explaining, “It takes a lot of courage to carry your own VIP freaking badge like this. It’s because when I purchase stuff, [people ask], ‘Is it really you?’”
She proceeded to sing a note that undoubtedly got the attention of her two-pound dog.
Dion quipped that “it happens to [her] a lot.”
“They don’t believe it’s me, so what I do is I take my old phone,” the songstress said, pulling out a rotary dial phone, “and I’m like, ‘OK, I’m gonna get you arrested, and I’m calling 9 freaking 11, and I’m asking for help.’”
Dion then applied a light pink lip gloss as she noted that “it’s dry in Las Vegas” and encouraged her fans to “stay moist.”
The segment concluded with her singing into the microphone and picking up her bag — only for its items to fall out and come crashing down to the floor.
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