Michael Richards reflected on his decision to leave Hollywood after exploding in anger and hurling racist slurs at hecklers during a 2006 stand-up show.
While reflecting on his infamous tirade at the Laugh Factory nearly two decades ago, the 74-year-old Seinfeld star, who revealed he was diagnosed with prostate cancer in 2018, admitted he’s ‘not looking for a comeback’ or the public’s forgiveness.
As he makes a tentative return to the public eye ahead of the release of his memoir Entrances and Exits, the father-of-two, who is married to Beth Skipp, recalled feeling ‘immediately sorry the moment’ he used the N-word on stage.
‘My anger was all over the place and it came through hard and fast,’ he explained to People. ‘Anger is quite a force. But it happened. Rather than run from it, I dove into the deep end and tried to learn from it. It hasn’t been easy.’
The three-time Emmy winner continued: ‘Crisis managers wanted me to do damage control. But as far as I was concerned, the damage was inside of me.’
Michael Richards reflected on his decision to leave Hollywood after exploding in anger and hurling racist slurs at hecklers during a 2006 stand-up show
He noted that he’s spent the past 17 years in ‘deep analysis’ to ‘figure out where all the anger was coming from.’
People noted that Richards has struggled with feeling not wanted after growing up with a single mom, ‘who had initially wanted an abortion, but they were illegal and dangerous at the time.’
Richards said that he believes his rage stemmed from his own insecurities and fears of not being accepted.
While speaking of the incident in 2006, Richards insisted he is ‘not racist’ and has ‘nothing against Black people.’
‘The man who told me I wasn’t funny had just said what I’d been saying to myself for a while. I felt put down. I wanted to put him down,’ he explained.
In November 2006, shocking footage of Richards emerged of him repeatedly calling an audience member, who interrupted his act, a racial slur.
‘Throw his ass out…He’s a n*****! Look there’s a n*****!’ Richards can be heard saying in the video.
During his meltdown, Richards repeatedly branded black members of the audience ‘n******’ while yelling: ‘Fifty years ago we’d have you upside down with a f***ing fork up your a***.’
While reflecting on his infamous tirade at the Laugh Factory (seen above in 2016) nearly two decades ago, the 74-year-old Seinfeld star admitted he’s ‘not looking for a comeback’ or the public’s forgiveness
As he makes a tentative return to the public eye ahead of the release of his memoir Entrances and Exits, the father-of-two, who is married to Beth Skipp, recalled feeling ‘immediately sorry the moment’ he used the N-word on stage (seen in 2002)
Following the shocking incident, he went on David Letterman to express his regret as he stated: ‘I’m really busted up over this and I’m very, very sorry. I am not a racist, that’s what’s so insane about this. I said some pretty nasty things to some African-Americans, a lot of trash talk.’
The father-of-two continued: ‘You know, I’m a performer… I push the envelope; I work in a very uncontrolled manner on stage. I do a lot of free association, it’s spontaneous, I go into character.’
According to The Guardian, at the time, his two-minute tirade left the audience ‘confused’ and ‘uncertain whether the extreme language was part of Richards’ act.’
The publication noted that, at one point, ‘the target of Richards’ comments shouted back at Richards several times, telling him that the insults were uncalled for.’
The actor portrayedCosmo Kramer on Seinfeld alongside costars Julia Louis-Dreyfus as Elaine Benes, Jason Alexander as George Costanza and Jerry Seinfeld as Jerry Seinfeld
Even while starring as Cosmo Kramer on Seinfeld, Richards said he ‘couldn’t connect to the joy of being an artist.’
‘I was a good character actor, but I was comfortable being the character, not in being me,’ he reflected.
His insecurities even had him turn down ‘the offer of a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame’ because he ‘didn’t feel deserving.’
‘I said no to hosting Saturday Night Live twice because I didn’t feel good enough. I was never really satisfied with my Seinfeld performance. Fame magnified my insecurities,’ the actor admitted.
Richards pictured with his wife, Beth Skipp, in 2010
In addition to a 15-year-old son, Antonio, who he shares with Skipp, Richards has a daughter, named Sophia (seen in 1996)
His book will also cover his secret battle with prostate cancer, which he said would have killed him in eight months without surgery, struggling with fame after launching to stardom portraying Cosmo Kramer on Seinfeld and being raised by a single mom.
‘[I’m] learning and healing. Healing and learning,’ he says of his quieter life now. ‘But life is always an up and a down. I continue to work through the day and the night, the light and the dark that I am.’
Richards’ near-death experience inspired him to release his memoir, which he said made him do a ‘full review’ of his life.
‘I had over 40 journals I’d kept over the years,’ Richards told People. ‘I’m turning 75, so maybe wanting to do that is something that comes with being my age.’
While embarking on the journey of penning his own life story, the performer said he ‘wanted to connect’ with his feelings and memories.
Ultimately, he joked that he was ‘surprised’ by ‘how much’ he ‘was able to remember.’
His memoir, Entrances and Exits, comes out on June 4.
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