Bunnie Xo contemplated suicide when she found out her husband, Jelly Roll, was cheating on her.
In her newly released memoir, “Stripped Down: Unfiltered and Unapologetic,” the podcaster described being suspicious that the Grammy award-winning singer was having an affair when they were experiencing marital issues around 2018.
The two had just tied the knot two years prior.
After one explosive fight, Bunnie detailed becoming “depressed” when the 41-year-old moved out of their Nashville home with his daughter from a previous relationship, Bailee.
Eventually, the 46-year-old showed up to one of Jelly Roll’s local concerts unannounced, which made him “irate.” Despite Jelly Roll denying he was being unfaithful, she later learned “he had his ex-fling waiting for him in a hotel down the street.”
That night, the wife of Jelly Roll’s best friend confirmed to Bunnie — whose real name is Alisa DeFord — that the singer was having an affair.
“She’d confirmed all the suspicions and fears I’d felt for the past ten months,” Bunnie wrote, adding that she decided in that moment to pack her bags and move back to Las Vegas.
“That night I contemplated taking my life,” she revealed. “The pain was so intense that I genuinely just wanted to end it all.”
Bunnie went as far as grabbing a bottle of pills from her bathroom, writing, “I stared at the bottle, wondering what it would feel like to die from an overdose.
“Would it hurt? Would I just fall asleep? What if it didn’t work and I woke up in a hospital? Would J even care if I was dead?”
But Bunnie ultimately decided not to give in to her suicidal ideations.
“I took a deep breath. Tomorrow is a new day,” she said. “Time to get the f–k out of here.”
After the couple privately agreed to a three-month separation, Jelly Roll eventually texted Bunnie and promised to finally tell her the truth.
When they met up, Jelly Roll lied to Bunnie and “made up a story about a drug dealer’s daughter he met at a bar, never admitting it was his ex-fling.”
Bunnie “believed” her husband and they moved back to Nashville — but everything blew up when she discovered he was texting and calling his “ex-fling,” with whom he was having an affair all along.
“From that day on, I didn’t want information from him anymore,” Bunnie wrote. “He had his chance and he squandered it. So I talked to her.”
Jelly Roll’s ex-fling sent Bunnie “videos, screenshots, timelines and […] everything about their ten-month affair,” including that he got his mistress a house for them to live in.
“And out of everything, that’s what made me sick,” Bunnie said. “It wasn’t about him f–king this broad—it was about emotionally cheating.”
Despite the affair, Bunnie decided to forgive her husband, whose real name is Jason Bradley DeFord.
“I’m not going to pretend that we just went back to normal. We absolutely did not,” she admitted, noting that the pair had “many fights and arguments” at the time.
During one incident, Bunnie felt “homicidal” when Jelly Roll said he didn’t regret the affair.
“It would take years for me to put the affair aside,” she wrote. “It would take years to actually feel like this man loved me—that I wasn’t disposable.”
Jelly Roll previously called cheating on Bunnie “one of the worst moments of my adulthood” on the “Human School” podcast in October.
“Because it was the first time that I was like, ‘I really can’t get this right at all. I know I’m in love with this woman,’” he explained. “It just really, really, really blew me back.”
The couple, who have custody of Jelly Roll’s daughter, celebrated their ninth wedding anniversary last year.
“Life is ours, we live it our way 💫 9 years of us ✨,” Bunnie wrote on Instagram in her tribute to her husband.
If you or someone you know is affected by any of the issues raised in this story, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-TALK (8255) or text Crisis Text Line at 741741.
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