Iskra Lawrence has opened up on how going through a dark period in her mental health after losing her Aerie modelling contract following the birth of her son, ended up resulting in the creation of her cult favourite brand, Saltair.
The body positive model, 35, launched the affordable luxury bodycare brand in 2022 with a mission ‘to help everyone feel confident, comfortable and empowered in their own skin’, with it finally landing in the UK at Space NK late last year.
But in a twist of fate, Iskra has revealed the successful company only came about as a result of her heartbreak after clothing retailer Aerie chose not to renew her modelling contract with them, after more than six years.
Speaking on the Ladies Who Launch podcast with Rochelle Humes about her entrepreneurial beginnings, the mother-of-two detailed how she had grown her social media following through her body positive advocacy.
After going viral for hitting back at vile fatphobic trolls, she explained how she harnessed the power of social media to create change with brands, leading the charge with banning her photos from being retouched.
But, while not mentioning Aerie’s name, she recalled to Rochelle how she was then dropped by a brand that she had been the spokesperson for, right before she welcomed her first son, Alpha, now four, with her partner Philip Payne.
Iskra Lawrence has opened up on how going through a dark period in her mental health after losing her Aerie modelling contract following the birth of her son, ended up resulting in the creation of her cult favourite brand, Saltair
The body positive model, 35, launched the affordable luxury bodycare brand in 2022 with a mission ‘to help everyone feel confident, comfortable and empowered in their own skin’, with it finally landing in the UK late last year (seen with partner Philip and their children)
But in a twist of fate, Iskra has revealed the successful company only came about as a result of her heartbreak after clothing retailer Aerie chose not to renew her modelling contract with them, after more than six years
‘I worked with a brand for over six years, I was the face of their brand, we did this anti-retouching movement, I worked with the National Eating Disorder Association with them,’ she said.
‘And in 2020 when I was about to give birth to my son, lockdown had just happened, they got rid of my contract.’
Iskra explained how being let go by the brand after working with them so closely for so many years was ‘triggering’ as it brought back a lot of feelings that she’d struggled with as a teenager, when she’d battled with body dysmorphia and an eating disorder.
She described how she ‘lost her sense of self’ and all the self confidence that had been the hallmark of her career, admitting ‘I didn’t even feel worthy of taking a shower.’
‘And that was really triggering for me because I’d been told, “You’re family, this brand is nothing without you”,’ she continued.
‘And I felt disposable again, which hit home that feeling of being disposable and not enough from when I was a teen.
‘So I lost my job and my sense of self, because I’d attached it to being the face of this brand and that was my purpose for a long time, because I wasn’t just a model in the campaigns – I was in every fit meeting, marketing meeting, board rooms.
‘And that was the moment where I said I never want to feel disposable again and so it was coming out of that and having postpartum depression, because I didn’t know what the future looks like now.’
Speaking on the Ladies Who Launch podcastwith Rochelle Humesabout her entrepreneurial beginnings, the mother-of-two detailed how she had grown her social media following through her body positive advocacy
But, while not mentioning Aerie’s name, she recalled to Rochelle how she was then dropped by a brand that she had been the spokesperson for, right before she welcomed her first son, Alpha, now four, with her partner Philip Payne (pictured)
She went on: ‘What happened was I stopped showering and that’s when I knew things were bad.
‘Because I had this toolbox of tools that I’d learned from my eating disorder recovery and years of talking about body confidence and self-esteem and mental health, and I couldn’t even bring myself to shower. I didn’t even feel worthy of taking a shower.
‘I was so bottom of the barrel priority and I remember Philip just being like, “What’s going on?” I was calling myself a mess, I felt disgusting, I was wearing just a black robe that I called my dementor robe, and was like moping around.’
Coming just six months after she’d given birth, Iskra was also suffering with postpartum depression at the time, with her struggles only exacerbated by the fact that it was during the pandemic and her boyfriend’s job had also been put on hold.
Meanwhile, the couple had just moved to a new state at the time and with lockdown restrictions, she was soon left without any ‘support’, revealing that her parents weren’t able to meet her son until he was 18 months old.
‘I was grateful and happy to be a parent, but it just didn’t look like what I thought it was going to’, she candidly said.
‘It was a pandemic and my parents, who I’m very close to, didn’t meet my son for a year and a half and I just didn’t have that support.
‘I moved from New York to Austin Texas at the same time and lost the job, and my husband‘s job was tour manager for an artist, so that all stopped.’
She described how she ‘lost her sense of self’ and all the self confidence that had been the hallmark of her career, admitting ‘I didn’t even feel worthy of taking a shower’
Coming just six months after she’d given birth, Iskra was also suffering with postpartum depression at the time, with her struggles only exacerbated by the fact that it was during the pandemic and her boyfriend’s job had also been put on hold
However, Iskra detailed how she know believes everything happens for a reason, revealing that it was only by getting to that place that she became inspired to create Saltair.
After realising how instrumental showers were for her as a source of relaxation and escape, she explained that she was motivated to create a product that could do the same for other people and allow them to take care of themselves.
She said: ‘I said I think I just need to get in the shower. And you look back on things now and you’re like, “Wow that was all meant to happen, because it led me to where I’m meant to be.”
‘Like you know people have those cheesy quotes, like: “Sometimes you have to break and be in little pieces to rebuild yourself stronger”. But for me it was like can I just get five minutes for a shower.
‘And that’s when I realised that this has a really transformational impact on me, something as simple as a shower. And I felt like, “okay if I shower and I feel and smell good then I might get dressed, I might do something with my hair.”
‘So I felt like I can’t be the only person that feels this way and I grew up with my mum now and again getting like a special product and her saving it and in those moments I got that, because I was like “I want to use luxurious products that smell good, but I feel guilty for using them every day.”
‘And so I was like where is this product that I can use? That smells amazing and transports me somewhere that I need to get to right now, because I need to escape from how I’m feeling, but isn’t so expensive that I feel guilty for using it and then has skincare benefits, but doesn’t feel clinical, because right now I do need something that just smells gorgeous. And that was literally Saltair.’
Iskra continued: ‘It was like how do I bottle the moment where I’m peace and that was when my toes were in the sand, waves are crashing, the sun is kissing my skin and I just take that breath of salt air.
However, Iskra detailed how she know believes everything happens for a reason, revealing that it was only by getting to that place that she became inspired to create Saltair
‘And like if we can bottle that and give it to people who need that right now, can I do that? Can I enable all these other people that are probably going through something similar to just take that moment and to take care of themselves.
‘That’s why every product says “everybody is welcome here” because I wanted to make sure everyone, no matter what they were going through, reminded themselves that you just have to take care of yourself.’
Iskra previously opened up about how she felt ‘lost’ and unsure of herself after clothing brand, Aerie, didn’t renew her modelling contract in a candid essay for Today back in 2022.
She explained that she felt pressure to keep up with the demands of her social media community and return to work because she is the ‘breadwinner’ in her family, but then she was left without a job to return to.
Reflecting on how her life had changed, after welcoming her son and relocating to Philip’s hometown in Texas, she said she went from a ‘model traveling the world’ to a ‘sleep-deprived zombie’.
‘Six months postpartum, I found out that Aerie didn’t want to renew my modelling contract,’ the British model wrote.
‘I felt lost — not just in relation to what I would do to continue supporting my family, but also in terms of who I was. I wasn’t modelling or traveling to events to speak about body acceptance.
‘I started to think I should just try getting back to “me” — and that “me” was a body-confident lingerie model. I started looking at my body and wondering if I felt confident enough.’
Iskra previously opened up about how she felt ‘lost’ and unsure of herself after clothing brand, Aerie, didn’t renew her modelling contract in a candid essay for Today back in 2022
She explained that she felt pressure to keep up with the demands of her social media community and return to work because she is the ‘breadwinner’ in her family, but then she was left without a job to return to
After 18 years of modelling swimwear and lingerie, Iskra admitted she began to question if she should even continue her career now that she was a mother.
She penned: ‘Then another thought dawned on me: Can I even do this? I’m a mother now. What would people think? Would my child resent me posting lingerie pics in 10 years? What about my family-friendly neighbourhood — will I embarrass myself if they all see me in my undies?’
‘I thought, “You’re a mother now. You’ll look desperate for attention and validation — it’s just not a good look”.’
She recalled understanding that she needed to find herself again, stating: ‘I wanted to rediscover the part of me that wouldn’t give a damn about parading around in my panties, or anyone’s opinions of me.’
Her first step was realising that she needed to focus on self-care — ‘even if that was just a daily shower, putting lotion on, and getting dressed in clothes that weren’t sweatpants.’
She said getting ready in the morning and putting on stylish outfits helped her feel like a model again, and she was eventually ready to strike a pose in lingerie and share the photos to her social media.
Iskra concluded the candid piece by revealing how the community of mothers who commented on her posts expressing how they had also felt they had to ‘switch off their sexuality’ postpartum, had inspired her to keep going.
‘I want them — and all mums — to know that you are the same person you were before you had a child, and that you can be whatever you want,’ she said.
After 18 years of modelling swimwear and lingerie, Iskra admitted she began to question if she should even continue her career now that she was a mother (seen last year)
‘Maybe you’ll never post a selfie at all — let alone in your undies — but you could, and it doesn’t matter what anyone else has to say. You are the sum of all your parts, and even if some feel forgotten, left behind, or unrecognizable now, they always live on. I know that now.’
Revealing the news that she would no longer be working as an Aerie spokeswoman in a lengthy Instagram post at the time, Iskra admitted it was being ‘heartbroken’ over the news.
She wrote: ‘I’m forever grateful for all we did together and all of YOU who supported me. I’m heartbroken I won’t be on tour again and that’s why I cried for quite some time when I got the news.
‘It felt like I was losing the movement I helped create and all of you with it. It also hurt my heart because I was still trying to navigate the pandemic as a first time mommy. So realising “going back to normal” wouldn’t happen made me feel even more lost.
‘Honestly that’s why it’s taken nearly a year for me to even be able to talk about it BUT sometimes you need a door to close, so that you can open a new one.’
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